The 20 minute rule of all parties walking away and taking a break from the argument.
One of the hardest things in life is to take emotion out of a situation and to stop and think before we speak or react. The 20 minute rule serves 2 purposes: The first is to give everyone a chance to calm down so things do not escalate to an uncontrollable situation. The second thing it serves is for all parties involved a few moments to clarify the issue and sort through the garbage pile to find a resolution without violence or saying things that don't matter.
By saying doesn't matter means: When we are involved in an altercation with others and it is filled with emotion, we do not stick to the problem of the moment. We tend to just throw anything and everything into the garbage pile and worse yet never clean up the pile. So we just put more litter in the yard that never gets picked up.
Think of it this way, if there were garbage all over your front yard, how do you start to clea